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The Top Ten Sucky Mom Moments of the Summer!

August 30, 2016


School is open next week.

I’m just as sick and sad as the kids. Yes, I haven’t worked on a regular schedule all summer, and am way behind my next deadline, and practically deserted my fabulous Probst Posse street team and only Facebooked posts about vacations and cocktails and foods I shouldn’t be eating but who the hell cares? Summer rocks. I don’t want to go back to work and I don’t want to wear boots and I don’t want my kids to go back to school. I’d be happy to live in summer my whole life and that’s just the way it is.

BUT…I can’t. I need to go adult again and try to convince my kids next week won’t suck the big one. During Labor Day weekend, there are tons of countdowns going on. Best music of the summer. Best books of the summer. Best movies of the summer.


I got a few.

1. Another summer gone and my youngest one still doesn’t know how to tie his shoes. Do they make velcro sneakers for teens?

2. Even though I had plenty of extra time, I still fed my kids crappy waffles and chocolate chip pancakes out of the box. For a little treat, I’d microwave some bacon and sausage and call it a morning. I’m a real rock star.

3. Piggybacking on the breakfast thing, I realized I’m still cutting up my boys’ waffles and putting on their syrup. Do they even know how to cut their food with a fork and butter knife? Why is it still easier to do it myself?!

4. I had intentions to read a lot to them this summer and be at the library once per week. Fail/Fail. But they definitely reached master status on the 3DS…

4. I forgot bath and shower day. I think at times they’ve gone the entire week and I comforted myself by saying chlorine from the pool washes away the germs. Dear God, does it???

5. They go to bed at midnight. The rule is as long as they don’t bother me, I don’t really care when they go to bed. At times this summer, I’ve finished up my book, looked at the clock to see 1am, and realized my boys were still wandering around the house doing shit. This cannot be a good thing.

6. The summer math homework for my oldest one is still untouched in the same place I left it in June.

7. The summer book list for my youngest one is still untouched in the same place I left it in June.

8. I forgot to put sunscreen on my boys. A. LOT.

9. My son still wore footy pajamas all summer because I never put away his winter shit.

10. We never had one play date with the hundreds of people I swore we’d see all summer—even our neighbors.

What’s your suckiest Mom moment of the summer?!


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  1. My son started back to school yesterday. He’s 16 and a junior in high school. All of his friends are driving. They’re all getting their licenses. All summer long I had nothing but time on my hands to take him driving. Did I? Once. Where is he now? Out riding his bike.

    I suck.

  2. Kathleen Brooks says:

    Apparently my daughter was supposed to keep a reading log and had to read a certain number and kind of books… Day before school we get an email from the teacher welcoming us to the class and telling us to bring the log. 9pm at night daughter is sitting on the bed ferociously writing all the books I’m digging out and asking “Did you read this? Crap, we need another non-fiction book. Here read this about Taylor Swift.”

  3. Cindy Colwell says:

    My kids did all the fun activities with their friends and their parents. I planned on repaying the favor and take their kids to do things but I never did. Is it wrong to just offer them cash for their trouble?

  4. Destini says:

    There were times this summer that I didn’t even get up for breakfast. My kids literally ate cereal out of the box.

  5. Tiffany King says:

    I let my 16 yr old stay up all night countless time, just so I could see how long he would sleep in the next day. (That way I wouldn’t have to worry about lunch items.)
    Pretty sure that’s earning me a ticket to bad mommy hell.

  6. Andrea says:

    Now you have me wondering if my son has a reading list or summer homework ?

  7. Tina Hobbs Payne says:

    I can pretty much say “ditto” to your entire list. My son is 12 and is complaining about not finding velcro shoes in his size. Lol. My daughter’s reading speed decreased because we played hard and didn’t read enough. I spent every day with both of my kids. We had a fantastic summer. I cry when they go back to school. I love watching my kids grow up but hate that they are growing up so fast. #noperfectwaytomom. ❤

  8. Heidi says:

    Yep- right there with ya momma ?

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